1 is different this time.....

Our sweet Nya Cicilia Jennifer is one today. When we saw her little face in that first picture never did I imagine that I would be holding this precious baby girl in my arms for her birthday. I feel so blessed not to have missed this day. The kids turning one has always been important to me, but this time, with Nya, it's a bit different. Usually at this point on their day, I'm remembering back... at this time I was only having light contractions.... at this time they were strong, I was petrified, and begging for drugs ;-) I know the exact time my precious boys entered this world.... With Nya all I can do is wonder. Was she born already at this time in Ug anda? Was she born early like I feel she was? Was Bio-Momma in labor for a while? Were there complications? The questions keep spinning. I'm trying to keep myself from crying not knowing. Is Bio-Momma missing her sweet baby? Is she thinking about this day a year ago? Oh, how I wish I had all the answers. It will be even harder when Nya is old enough to wonder and ask about it and I can't tell her anything because this Momma doesn't know anything. I can tell her how thankful I am for Bio-Momma. I can tell my Nya that Bio-Momma left us the most precious little blessing that day. I will tell her that Bio-Momma could have chosen to end my sweet little Nya's life, but instead chose to bring her into this world.
Nya will always know how thankful I am to Bio-Momma. Nya will always know how much I love Bio-Momma for all she did. Even though it wasn't done in God's original plan for a Momma and her daughter, it was God's plan to bring Bio-Momma to the right place at the right time so our Nya would get to the right place to be matched and placed with our specific family. My prayer today is that if Bio-Momma is thinking about her baby girl that God will allow her to know that Nya is safe, happy, and being cared for on her special day. My prayer for the rest of Nya's years will be that she won't take Bio-Momma for granted, that she would always remember Bio-Momma decided to give her life and because of that this Momma will be able to enjoy the life Bio-Momma brought into this world.

Happy birthday Sweet Girl! Momma loves you so much it hurts sometimes..... The earliest picture of our baby girl that we have.

The picture that introduced us to our Nya. (referral picture)

Our baby girl now! What a difference love and her own family makes!